Killtacular Ten Year Olds

As I've gotten older, I've realized that I'm no longer good at the games I used to love. I loved flight simulators. I loved blowing stuff out of the sky, out of space, underwater, in the bellies of volcanoes, everywhere. But eventually, the games became too responsive, because the computers became better. When the first FPS's (first person shooter) came out, I had no trouble keeping up with Castle Wolfenstein and Dark Forces. But the twitch muscles began to betray me, and my eyes began to tire easily from the forced perspective. By the time Halo came out, it was all over. I didn't mind shooting my friends over networked Xboxes, because we were all the same age, and had pretty much the same suckage. But you would never ever entice me to play Halo online, because I never wanted to suffer the humiliation of getting pwn3d by some 10 year old, using my death as a stepping stone to receiving the "Un-freakin-believable" honor. What does that look like? Ask the poor schlubs in the video below.

"No! You said you were gonna go get me some chocolate milk!"