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Friday, July 12, 2024

Elf-san wa Yaserarenai - Episode 1 - Elfuda Loves French Fries

Summer sweating and thicc elf carbo-loading season is here! Elfuda can't stop eating tasty fast food french fries.

Huh. That gate to an alternate dimension looks sketchy. Ooh. A stereotypical elf stepped through those doors. I see a werewolf on a staircase. Ha! All the monster girls are in this introductory montage. Jiggly doctor at the chiropractic relaxation clinic! Aw, join her for drinks, Naoe! I want to see Akiho-sensei get handsy. Uh oh. The last patient of the day is creepy. Naoe, you take her. “Elfuda” calls him a “human.” Odd. Elfuda wants to get rid of her love handles. Dear readers, let me familiarize you with the Japanese word “debu” (デブ, chubby, fat). Because Elfuda is making her chubby “debut.” She never had those rolls of fat when she “ran through the meadows” back home in Kafar. Where’s that? Naoe figured it out. Elfuda is an elf (エルフだ)!

Geh.

Elfuda wears an “I ♥️ Oil” T-shirt. Miss Plus-Sized Elf, we can tell. Chubby nipples! Squeal! Akiho-sensei has curves in the right places, too. Elfuda hasn’t felt this intense hands-on treatment before. That’ll change quickly! Elfuda needs a few post-orgasmic moments. Elf ears confirmed! Where did she grab that bow from? Oops. That T-shirt was on its last thread. Man! I thought jiggle physics was necessary for breasts, but belly jelly wiggling makes technological strides here. Elfuda’s skin-colored panties aren’t long for this world, either.

Elfuda explains how the gate to her parallel world works: her weight must be the same as when she passed into Japan. That’s the most creative thing I’ve ever heard about gates in anime about parallel worlds! But why did Elfuda come to Japan? For french fries! Ah. Elf cuisine is primitive compared to the foodie nation. The “human” food is too tasty, so the “human” doctor needs to take responsibility! That suspiciously sounds like injecting fat seeds to expand an elf’s belly is the same as creaming a raw human pie. Degenerates out there know what I mean!

Elfuda signed up for Naoe’s weight-loss treatment. He’s a personal trainer! Miss Plus-Sized Elf, no french fries on your diet! Increasing metabolism could create a caloric deficit faster, so how about adding sauna and hot tub sessions to Elfuda’s aerobic exercise? Akiho-sensei merely desires a chubby partner to hang out with her in the spa. Elfuda marvels at the convenience of hot baths without the toil of boiling water with cords of firewood. No chocolate milk, either!

Yay! Elfuda is back to her fit, thicc self. She can pass through the portal again.

Hey, Naoe can have a bit of junk food to celebrate. Ack! She’s stuffing her face with french fries again! Elfuda’s T-shirt says, “Calorie Love.” She went home and came back to Japan for french fries! Why? Because she knows she can lose weight again! Naoe-san, mada yoroshiku onegaishimasu!

Next time, a dark elf convenience store clerk pays a visit.

Plus, debu fans rejoice for the end credits.

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